Apr 7

First and Second Position – and Why It Changes the Way You Talk to Customers

There’s one model we always start with at Sales Coach:
First and Second Position.
Why?

Because it explains why so many sales conversations go wrong – and what to do instead.

Most people operate from first position:
Me. My product. My quota.

And guess what? The customer feels it. And backs off.

You’ve probably heard it before:
“Hi, we’re a gold partner with XYZ, and we’d really like to understand your needs...”


But everything still revolves around you.

Second Position: It’s About the Customer. Period.

Second position is your access point to real trust.
It’s where you start caring about the customer’s world – not just your own targets.


Try questions like:

  • What’s happening in your industry right now?

  • What’s your role as an IT leader – and what are you measured on?

  • What compliance or security pressures are you facing?

  • What ambitions are you trying to deliver on?


It’s not about you. It’s about them.
And once they feel seen and understood, they’ll ask:
"Okay, sounds interesting... what can you actually help with?"

First Understand. Then Be Understood.

Stephen Covey said it best:
“Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”


That’s the heart of the first and second position model.


Understand the customer before talking about yourself.
Once trust is built – then you can share your experience, your solutions, and your why–what–how–value.


But always in their context. Not yours.

Use It. Every Day.

First and second position isn’t just for conversations. It’s just as relevant when you:

  Write emails

  Fill in CRM

  Build proposals

  Summarize meetings


Everyone reads through their own lens.

The CFO thinks control.

Marketing thinks speed.

HR thinks people.

So adapt your language to the role – and hit where it matters most.

Want to be the person customers actually enjoy talking to?

Then ditch the “me me me.”

Listen, understand – then tell your story.


It all starts with perspective.

And with practice. Over and over again.

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